The event of reconnecting with the other half of my soul was honestly the stranges experience I've ever had.
After the initial breaking down of the wall I had built when I was young, everything began to feel distant. I had control of my body, but everything was very displaced.
When it started, I originally thought it was a fight for dominance, but after a while, I started to realize it was more of a test. Kauti was checking to see if I was really ready to handle the reconnection.
I had made sure I was in a hidden voice channel in a friends discord, and eventually they did show up and stayed with me during the experience. I described to them as best I could what was happening, but trying to explain something so non-physical is almost impossible.
By the end, I could feel how exhausted my soul was, and when I rejoined my soul, I felt drained.
Over all the event took about 2 hours, and it was the stranges and wildest experience ever.
My first experience with the Second Wind ability was about an hour after the initial connection was made with Kauti.
After having gone through reconnecting with Kauti, I was sitting on my own, just relaxing to and feeling really tired.
But moments before deciding to go to bet, I suddenly felt a rush of energy start coursing through my body.
I was buzzing with energy, so I decided to tunnel that energy into some art. so I hopped into a VC with some others and started working on art while I was chatting with them all.
Three hours later I started to crash hard. The second wind had run it's course and both myself and Kauti were spent.
I said my good night's to everyone and went to bed. I slept so well that night, I slept for about 9 hours.
I used to always find purring to be extrememly relaxing, but over the years, I'd stopped doing it.
Maybe I stopped because I'd forgot, or maybe it was because of my depression, but after reconnecting with Kauti, it popped into my mind to try again.
With everything going on in my life, the stress in my body was so high, that I could see it every night, through physical jittering and exhaustion.
At first I'd completely forgot how to actually purr like I'd done before, but after a few tries, I somewhat had it back. And once I had it, I couldn't stop.
I sat alone in a voice channel on discord for over 30 minutes, just purring to myself. The effectiveness it has to reduce the stress is staggering! I don't understand why I ever stopped.
I now do this every other night, where I will just sit and purr to myself for 30 minutes.
The first time I felt an actual attempt from Kauti to communicate, I wasn't quite sure what it was.
There was a pinch on my left arm, but there wasn't any reason I could think of that I would be feeling that. It was like I was being poked with a claw.
It went away for a moment, but then it came back in somewhat of a rhythm. Like somone trying to get my attention, but they couldn't speak.
Then I felt her actual presense. Kauti was next to me, trying to get me to notice her. It was odd at first, but it soon felt fairly natural. Like I'd reconnected with an old friend.
It was a very emotional experience. I wish I'd never let my anxieties lock her away as a kid. Without Kauti, I was like a husk trying to just survive off the scraps.
I can't imagine my life without Kauti by my side to experience it all with me.
I heard her voice for the first time the other day, while I was trying some meditation. It was difficult to make out what she said, but I'm not used to hearing even my own voice when I'm thinking to myself.
Even though she had to call out quite loudly for me to hear her, her voice was still soft and caring. It caught me off guard, though, and it scared me out of my meditation.
I guess with time, I will be able to hear her voice more naturally, making it much easier to communicate without getting all the random noise that comes with direct thought communication.
I'm going to keep doing these meditations in an attempt to make it easier for myself to hear her clearly.